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Thursday, July 18, 2013

From a different chamber.

I said I'd write a post from the heart, but I don't think i have it in me to write one. Not that I don't have anything to write. Infact I have a lot on my mind but this is no place for it. What i do write is also from the heart, but it's from a different chamber altogether.

It's almost two a.m. I am in my room. Just had a bottle of mountain dew. Looked through some clothes online, found nothing except a nice wear-at-home tee. Had green tea earlier which tasted awful. It was bitter and made my throat feel weird but i had it anyway. Meetings cousins tomorrow. Should be fun. I feel disturbed when i see people break into pieces right in front of me because of love. I'm halfway through reading A farewell to arms and I don't like Catherine Barkley. There's no me. I'm you. I'm a good girl aren't I? What is up with that? Frankly, I find it pretty annoying. I don't get people who have no sense of self. It's unacceptable

s1: You have this quality..
me: I know.
s1: Something in you that makes everybody want to be your mom.
me: I know.
s1: Why is that?
me: I don't know. But it works for me.

I watched A Roman Holiday today. Ah. What a movie. It was like a hug. Audrey Hepburn has a great smile. Radiant. I love scolding mom. She is such a bunny. White bunny. I want to write a letter to someone. Don't know who. But i would love to write one. I love letters. People don't write letters anymore. My third knuckle is always painful and makes it hard for me to write during exams.

Me: Hi
N: I miss you. Bleh. Whatever. kthanksbye.
Me: LOL.Yeaaah, i was fun wasn't I? (:
N: Don't push it.

Never ask people what's wrong with them if you don't really want to know. It's unfair to everyone. The other day i was talking to s2 about being there for people. And i told her to be there silently. And she said that silently being there doesn't count. And i told her that it does. Because i mean. I'm always silently there for people. What the hell.

Me: Say something interesting and i'll write it on my blog.
W: Oooo okay.
     Water flotation device.
Me: ....

Mom calls me the buffer of the family. She says that i neutralize everything. My mom has a golden heart. I want one too. I hate how most of the times I have no self control. I'm very easy on myself but also very hard. Never in front of other people though. Never be hard on yourself in front of other people or they will be hard on you too. I think.

Tomorrow is a new day. Let's rejoice.

p.s. 400th post! Special thanks to all those people who read and comment. You make my day. Truly.

2 comments:

Ayesha Khatri said...

it was so random and fun to read. i found these lines very much relatable.

I have no self control. I'm very easy on myself but also very hard. Never in front of other people though. Never be hard on yourself in front of other people or they will be hard on you too. I think.

Aqsa said...

Have I mentioned that I love the randomness in your posts?

This line is so philosophical:
"Never be hard on yourself in front of other people or they will be hard on you too. I think."