February is right around the corner. My favourite month by FAR. Something magical about feb. AND I am hoping i will get my visa next month as well. Its a feeling. And its the last touch of winter. And I was borned in feb too.
I have developed a new obsession: Fragrances.
Its an expensive obsession. I want a huge perfume closet. I want all of them. There a couple on my list that i will definitely get once I move. Last night I wore a very nice scent and enjoyed it through out the time I was out. However, no one complimented me. Wtf? That's alright..I guess.
Can you tell, I'm a tad bit over caffeinated right now. A little wonky tonky.
I've got to say. A bed side table is an amazing thing. Everything you need is there. Mine currently has my water bottle. A night cream. My watch, charger, lamp. Floss. A couple of hair pains. Melatonin. A hair tye. A gel pen. A mug of green tea. My earbuds. A box of tissues. And an eye mask that I don't use. WHAT ELSE can one need? I also think I need to declutter a bit lols. On the other side however I have my journal, another pen. A tasbeeh. Panadol. And a tweezer. I think I am equipped for life, just sayin.
When they say emotional regulation is the most important skill to have, perhaps they are right. At times I stick out like a sore thumb, more often than I'd like. And more often than not, I channel my inner snail. And retreat to my shell. And more often than not, it seems to be the only way to go. However, I'm glad that tomorrow is a new day. Its almost a miracle. How we get a new shot at life every 24 hours. We take it for granted, but it really is a blessing. To begin over and over.
Well. Today is the 1st of Feb. And guess what. My visa arrived. Miracles do happen. I told A, we will be cuddling ten hours per day and I will glue myself to him and he said I can do whatever I want.
But also guess what, I've been mush inside all day. I am feeling at least 73 emotions right now. And have cried about 15 times as well. I don't know if anyone can understand all that I am feeling and why. But I do feel it all, and intensely so. A mountain of uncertainty lies ahead. There's that saying that goes something like Tell your mountains about your God. So i guess I shall.
Every thought in my mind is tagged with an emotion. Sometimes I wonder how life would be if I didn't have to hold back my tears so much, so often. Hmmm. Easier, I think. Life would be easier.
